Lum and Abner Take Selves on a New York Trip

Cedric Gets Wropped Up in door That Goes ‘Round

BY ABNER PEABODY, Special Correspondence

We went to New York to look for Robert, but instead of finding him there like we figgered, he was stayin’ over at Mount Ida with some friends of the family. But we was glad we went. Lum says travel is broadening. Travel may broaden some but I leave I broaden better here at home eatin’ Elizabeth’s cooking. I lost 10 pounds on that trip.

We enjoyed the trip on the train. You know they’ve got ’em fixed up now where you can eat and sleep right on ’em. They’ve got some way of pullin’ them chairs you ride on in the daytime together and makin’ beds out of ’em. They weren’t enough to go around though, and I had to sleep on a shelf up over Lum. They had some little hammocks in there, but I reckon they’re just for the children fer me or Cedric neither one could get in ’em.

What–No Nickel?

They’ve got a new way of runnin’ street cars in New York now, and it works out fine. Stid of runnin’ up the streets they’ve got tunnels digged under the ground fer ’em to run in. This is a good idy cause they ain’t no danger of cattle or livestock gettin’ on the track. Only way you can get down to ’em is going through a turn-stile, and a cow wouldn’t know you had to put a nickel in ’em before they’d turn, even if they had to money.

We spent a week up there and most of the time we was broke. We never missed no meals, but we postponed several. Cedric had his first dealins’ with a revolvin’ door at the hotel. He got in the thing and got it turnin’ so fast he couldn’t get out. The section behind him kept crowdin’ him, so he kept shovin’ the door in front of him and more he shoved the faster the door behind him went and he run there for thirty minutes before he finally got so dizzy headed he turned loose and lit right out in the middle of the sittin’ room floor. It was just like arguin’ with a balky horse to try to get him to go through ’em again.

Big Open Lot

They’ve got a mighty fine town up there alright, but the citizens ain’t showin’ much confidence in its future. Right in the middle of the town is about twenty acres of land layin’ out, not buildin’ of no kind on it. It’s bein’ used right now for a park and picnic grounds of some kind. Me and Lum figgered some of tryin’ to share crop it this year. A body could put in a crop of pertaters there and wouldn’t have to haul no piece hardly to sell ’em. There’s hotels enough around to use what the land would grow. But we never could find out who owned the land so we come back home.

All I can say is if Pine Ridge gets to be as big as New York I’m movin’ to Cherry Hill.

–From The Pine Ridge News, Spring 1936

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